Well, here I am back in L.A. I had to change my flight to fly back through Cleveland instead of Newark. I probably wouldn't have gotten home if I had flown through Newark cuz there were delays and cancellations because of the snowstorm. It's hard coming home after a vacation--even though it was sort of a working vacation this time (getting the house ready to be lived in). Now it's back to the bills, etc.

I haven't had to parent my parents yet. They're relatively young --70 and 71--and still doing okay. Luckily.

You know the old saying: "Be good to your kids, they'll be picking out your nursing home."

It's a snow day here. Just got back from a week in Las Vegas and was really anxious to get back to school but you can't see an inch in front of your nose so that's that. I'm dreaming of a White Christmas - Tra la la la la la la la la !

Pat, I like your point about parenting our parents. To think that my boys might one day be parenting me is a little disconcerting. I am sure that tying me to the roof of the car and taking dad for a Sunday drive is well within the realm of possibilities.

I'm glad your mom is happier now, and not a bit surprised. We moved Dave's up here to PI a year after we arrived. She was only in her 60's but her "lifestyle" had created an old women in a young body. Dave's sister, living in Belmont, MA just an hour away was unwilling to step in. Anyway, Roberta has been here with us for 11-12 years and decling so we have had to move her here and there depending on her level of capability and just recently found a beautiful, loving, small home for adults about 20 minutes from us where she has probably never been happier. The staff is wonderful and there are only a total of 6 people in residence. It's the kind of place that I would choose for myself if it came to it. She had resisted this move right up to the last minute, in fact her belongings had already been moved when she sat down and said she wasn't going. But we knew the neighbors and staff where she was living were enabling her lifestyle and we weren't going to let it continue. Cool heads prevailed and she can't say enough about how happy she is. It's an awfully tough time, parenting your parents.

My dad on the other hand is not incapable of taking care of himself but his companion is allowing her very strong willed and possessive children to make this decision. they've been pressing for this for 5 years now. Dad doesn't want to live down there without Rachel though. It would be terribly lonely. The years after mom died were very hard for him. I guess my concern as long as he is willing to make this move is how much decision making will be done by Rachel's family. What personal decision making will be giving up. But he's a big boy and I'm struggling not to say too much.

Pouring rain, I'll say! I had to be at work at 7:00 this morning and would have made it, but the river had flooded the road on my final leg of my commute. One ten mile detour later, I made it to work- ten minutes late for a conference call with big Swiss bosses.

Bi-coastal? Sounds like bi-polar. Maybe that's what I'll be if I go back and forth too often!

I'm still getting used to the cold here. I have to force myself to go outside. It's so warm and cozy inside, and if I have a good book, I never get bored inside. But yesterday I was out all day in the pouring rain buying silly things like coasters and sugar cannisters.

The west coast of Vermont is warm and soggy today with below zero temps expected tomorrow night. . . and the west coast of California must be a whole lot better than that right now!?! I did go snowboarding on Tuesday in some big powder but . . . now, oh well.

Congratulations Lori! You are now officially bi- coastal!

Well, maybe not ALL of Karen's ideas! But a lot of them.

The Vermont native in Lori is still evident. When I arrived at Lori and Avi's new place on the shores of Lake Champlain, I found Lori knee deep in icy waters as she caught a northern pike with her bare hands. Lori, are you sure that all of Karen's ideas sound good? It appeared to me that you are into more of a bear-skin rug phase of life.

Just kidding! Lori and Avi have a nice place with beautiful sunsets out the living room window. It was fun to spend time with them.

I think audio blog is like a shared voice messaging thing. I am not really sure though.

Hi. I've been away from the blog for the past week, but now I'm back and enjoying all your comments! I'm still in Vermont. I guess I didn't mention that last time we were in Vermont, we bought a small house in Colchester right by Lake Champlain. We plan to rent it out for short-term vacations so that we'll also be able to use it ourselves. We've been busy all week buying furniture, kitchen stuff, etc. etc. so that the house will be ready to be lived in. We got a computer, too, so I'm sitting here in Vermont writing on the blog, and it feels different writing from here! Anyway, we got a lot done. Avi went back to L.A. yesterday, and I'll be here until Sunday finishing up. Richard stopped by to see us on Monday while we were waiting for the cable guys to come. It was nice to see him again! And, Patti, maybe I'll get to see you on one of your visits to your father once he moves to Burlington. We'll be here more often now that we have this place. I know what you mean, Karen, about the heart being in Vermont. I think my heart is split between Vermont and Israel. And by the way, I wouldn't mind getting all those presents you mentioned!!! I talked to Janice on the phone yesterday and Brian a few days ago, but I probably won't get to see them on this visit.

Richard, what's that audio blog you mentioned? You can't hear me talking, can you?

I am thankful everyday that mine are both still alert and active. Good luck to you both, these things are so hard.

It's good to move your parents while they can still be a useful part of the transition. I have not had this luck and my sister and brother have been useless. After 6 years of remotely managing my mother's life in Spfld from Burlington, including having people at her house seven days a week; I got court appointed guardianship and moved her to an elderly care living situation. Now, almost one year later I have finally sold her house. What a relief! The kicker is that my mother is happier where she is now.

Well it's Saturday night and my dad just called from Florida. Seems he is moving back to the Burlington area. His companion, Rachel, has children living there and they have convinced Dad and Rachel that they can no longer take care of themselves and need to "come home" and be taken care of. So when the house sells that's what they will do. It would never have occured to me to tell my dad that he couldn't take care of himself. At least not at this point. He's only 75. But he doesn't want to live alone and so he is going along with this plan. At least as he says, he'll be closer. Guess I'll be over in northern Vt sooner than I figured.

Jeez I'd like to be able to walk away from my monitor and go for a drive. Sounds wonderful. Think my students would notice I wasn't in the room? Maybe not.

Next week I'm traveling with Dave to Las Vegas. He's on business and I'm tagging along. Unfortunately it's cold there too. I was hoping to be poolside with a good book. Oh well. I'll find something to do I'm sure. I'll be staying at the Paris Hotel in case anyone wants to call or come by.

Well, if it reminded you of driving the backroads in Spfld, then you must have been drinking, smoking or looking for a place to go parking! Hope you didn't throw your empties out the window! HAHA!

I just took a drive up around the western side of Mt. Mansfield. It's cold, snowy, and really beautiful today. After lunch, I couldn't stand the idea of being back here staring into my computer monitor, so I decided to drive until I felt like turning around. It reminded me of driving around the back roads of Spfld during high school. It also reminded me of what a drag it is to be staring into this monitor. I think I need a ripping day on a snowboard to make it all right again.

Karen I'd love to pop over and do your decorating. I enjoy it actually and miss having people around to do it for. The "guys" expect to have it done but are too old to participate anymore. All busy with work and that sort of thing. They certainly notice when I don't do the usual overwhelming do over the entire house thing. I tried just not bothering, kinda went on strike a couple of years ago. I'm the one who missed it the most though so back to it I went. This year I'm having a bunch of my gal pals from school over for a cookie exchange on the 22nd so there will be someone to ooh and aww over my efforts.

On a whole nother topic: I'm not a fan of wings. Any wings.

I do make a terrific pumpkin pie and I'm not sure how it can screwed up. Although I don't like to cook particularly I do great deserts and volunteer for that part of most get togethers. Dave has a gluten allergy so 20 years ago I found I needed to come up with some creative cooking when it came to deserts. I make a spectacular gluten free chocolate cake. It's surprising actually how many people find they are gluten intolerant.

wings are only good on maxi pads ........... sorry!

Are the seven foot wings that the Victorias Secret models wear on the runway considered "actually wearable". Gerda would look very good with seven foot wings. Thanks for the ideas! I will get busy now before it's too late.

A massage, a great bottle of champagne, some aromatherapy or massage oil, a certificate for a weekend get away, JEWELRY - anything but especially diamonds, a manicure, pedicure or facial, a good book, actually wearable items from Victoria's Secret, gift cert. to a class of interest to her (cooking, computer, crafts, MASSAGE!), a family portrait sitting before your first one leaves home, perfume, warm fuzzy stuff like slippers and robes, gourmet coffee, anything that you make yourself (maybe woodworking in your case) kitchen gadgets from Williams Sonoma and ......... naughty stuff from that store with the black paper on the front door!!!!! Hope this helps, now go take a cold shower!

I like the honesty of "Your cooking sucks". It reminds me of the hunting camp where anyone who complains becomes the next cook, though. My theory with my sister in law has always been that I am dealing with an iceberg, where most of the story is hidden under water. I guess I have wanted to keep it that way and haven't really been very honest. And, I really think I could maintain my dishonesty if that pumpkin pie would stop popping out of the water like a penguin with a gas problem.

A Southern Living magazine subscription would be a very unexpected present to slip into, my wife, Gerda's Christmas pile. Any other ideas for that special someone?

A tatoo was the best present that I never had to actually get for her. The fact that I suggested it made her feel like a wild woman. My boys called it off, because they couldn't handle the idea of having a mom with a tatoo.

Twelve hours of driving time Pat, and with the stops about 14. We are used to it now after being away for the last 10 years. When we lived in KY it was a 14 hour driving trip. The older my parents get the more I would like to be back closer. I like things about everywhere that we have lived but in the end the heart brings you back. Glad you have the holiday spirit Pat. Would you like to come do my decorating? Richard, don't you think at almost 50 that we have the RIGHT to speak up and say "Your cooking sucks"? Okay, well then buy her a subscription to Southern Living magazine or the food channel........ Just trying to help!

I had 3 wreaths delivered to me at school today by one of my students so I have a fun project tonight decorating them. Hope to put up our tree later this week. Awfully cold here too, like most of the north east low temps and windy. Guess fall is over. It's too cold to string lights on the house. Our neighbors are way ahead of us in the decorating department but we'll catch up bye and bye.

Glad to hear Janice and Butch are doing well. Sounds like a good trip Karen. How long a ride is it for you?

Hi, we also made it back safely and had a good time with family. Saw Janice and Butch for a little while too. They are great. Here it is quite cold, low 20's this morning and we are expecting snow for Fri. and Sat. I guess I will have to try to get in the spirit and put up a tree this weekend. Just really wishing we could skip right over it all. Bah Humbug!!

Hey ya'll, made it back to GA safely and only saw three accidents on the way. One was the usual HUGE. Took a side road and stayed out in the country in VA then arrived back here early afternoon yesterday. Mom had me bring furniture back this time so good thing I drove and had the Grand Caravan. They had a few cdold nights while I was gone so the impatients finally bit the whatever and its time to plant the winter stuff. The dog and cat were sure glad to see me and I played with them the rest of hesterday aftermoon. Back to work tomorrow. Got to finish unpacking today and maybe get the rest of the leaves up in the yard.

And once again, my sister-in-law brought new life and meaning to the words "truly unremarkable".

Did you see the "Audio Blog" option on the http://new.blogger.com/ web page? You can connect to our blog account from your cell phone and listen to voice messages. Gee whiz, I have trouble leaving a message that I can live with on my voice mail and it usually takes me 4 tries. I think that this dinosaur is not ready to audio blog yet. Note to self: I bet Dale Carnegie can help me.

You're welcome Roland but all I did was get some e-mail addresses together. The credit for the work on the reunion goes to John LaPlante and countless others living in the Spfld. area. They did all the real work and it was a great event! The blog idea came from Brian and although we never see him here anymore, the credit for all our continuing conversations certainly goes to him.

I hope everyone had a safe Thanksgiving and a great visit with family and friends.............yes, Roland and I "made it happen", by getting together and having lunch.............a very long one, I can say, the dinner people were coming in when we finally decide to leave. the atmosphere was very nice, it was a victorian style house and they converted it into a eating establishment. Restauraunt is not a good work for it and doesn't do it justice. The atmosphere was very nice and they had decorated it for Christmas already. The mantel where were (may have been back parlor) was really nice. I even think the music they played was 70s-80s. Very fitting...........It was great talking about old times, catching up on our individual lives over the past 30 years, and what our goals for the future are...........

Hey all! I finally got up to CT for Turkey and Nancy & I went out to lunch. I took her to the Victorian House here in Cheshire and we had a very LONG lunch, afterall it was 30 some odd years of cathching up. I really enjoyed it and hope to be able to meet more of you next time. Seems that Nancy's mom and mine have mutuall friends and we hope to get them together on the net soon. Hope all had a great day and arrived safely. It didn't snow heree this year and my trip up through the Blue Ridge Mts was relaxing. I stayed over in VA and drove through via the sunrise, so beautiful all those colours and shades. It rained today but Nancy and I had a great time remembering all the "good ol times" in VT. Did someone say something about getting together in a few years for our 35? I'd be willing to help. That sure was alot of work you did Patti for the 30th and sound like everyone enjoyed it. Nancy said something about trying to get some friends together to all celebrate our half century of experiences this summer or fall, that would be great too!! Well, looks like we all have lots to be thankful for and have basically turned out ok and looks like most of the kids are doing as well. I enjoy hearing about how well they are doing even though I don't know them. Carrying on the spirit of creativity and individuality to follow in our footsteps but a notch higher or two eigh? Yes, Patti, I know about those long commutes. GA is a VERY large state land mass wise although the HD is much close than yours.

Hey Lori 8 hours ain't nothin to us backwood northern Mainers. Actually, it sucks to have to drive to get anywhere. Tomorrow Dave and I are driving about 2 3/4 hours south just to get to the nearest health food store and Home Depot. So relatively, 8 hours to visit a dear friend isn't that bad. Unfortunatly, I'm back to school Monday until the 22nd of Dec. which means I don't have an 8 hours to use. One of these trips east for you I'm coming over. I told Karen I wanted to get "us girls" together for a pajama party. Wouldn't that be a blast!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Patti, I'll be in Burlington until Dec. 14. If you're going to be in the area, I'd love to see you. I like the way you say ONLY 8 hours! That's no big deal for you??? I'm pretty ignorant about Maine. I've never been to any part of it--north, south, or coast.

It's surprising actually how many of our students have never been south of Bangor. There's really an unfortunate north south condition of living in Me. I've never spent time on the coast as an adult, though Kevin lived there for about six months. I worked with Jane at a restaurant in Old Orchard Beach right after graduation.

People up here like to refer to the coastal areas like Kennebunkport and the "Bush Compound" as parts of MA because the Bush family doesn't do ME particularly from their lifestyle. I guess that's the argument. I don't really think of myself as being from Maine either so there you go.

No offense intended.

Excuse me, we go to Bar Harbor, MT Dessert Island and it is definitely part of ME, but there sure are tourists there from everywhere!! Rich's parents grew up in Bar Harbor so he has family there and a family camp. We love it. No offense taken, haha!

Lori how long will you be in VT? I wish it was a trip closer to Christmas then I would dirve over and meet you somewhere. I have time off then. One of your trips east we have to meet! It's only about 8 hours or so from here to the greater Burlington area I guess. It seems like about 8 hours to almost anywhere from here some days. Spfld. is a little longer I think. Its easy to go downstate but over to get through NH is where we run into some interesting roads. Jerry probably knows the best way. I think we need a mini winter reunion. Of course everyone is welcome to come to the beautiful state of ME to visit. I know Karen goes to the coast in summer, right? Up here we don't really think of that as ME. It's often called part of MA actually by the financially disgruntled. (snicker)

I wish Happy Thanksgiving to anyone who doesn't get back on here before then. Please everyone, travel safely. Enjoy that pie!

Enjoy your pumpkin pie, Richard!

Maybe you should drive, Karen! Then you can go as slow as you want. I feel safer in the driver's seat most of the time!

Good one Richard! Don't get too cocky all of you east of here ......... Minneapolis got it yesterday, we are getting it today (only 3 inches so they say) and guess who is on the track after NY? My prediction, not the weather man's ......... but never say never. I will be sure to pack my nerves of steel for the drive and the phrase my husband loves to hear "Would you please SLOW DOWN!!!

It will be 60 degrees and sunny here today. For you travellers coming through the NE, there is only a little rain or snow expected on Thanksgiving.

We are doing Thanksgiving at our house for the 1st time. Gerda's mom hasn't got another bird in her (we have always gone to her place in the past). The rumor is that she is bringing something chocolate for dessert though! It will also be one more year of the scourge of my sister in law's pumpkin pie. Like turning gold into lead, she has mastered making cardboard out of whole wheat flour and, hey, the pumpkins are in her garden, "You have to eat those!" Maybe this year I will tell her that we have slugs in our garden, but we don't eat them.

Happpy Thanksgiving to all of you! We'll be having it at our house with all of Avi's family. And 2 days after that we'll be having a big barbeque here for Avi's mother's 70th birthday. We'll be traveling the following week, though--back to Vermont on Dec. 2. I'm looking forward to that.

No snow here and nothing expected. I was shopping this weekend and startled by the Christmas and winter type decorations. It's like early fall here still. Tons of rain and wind but no snow in sight. Hard to believe the first of December is just around the corner.

Dave's sister is here from Belmont, MA for a couple of days. We've recently moved "mom" into a group residential home and this is her first opportunity to visit.

The boys will be over for Thanksgiving Dinner, veggie burgers for Kevin. Ketchup on my Thanksgiving Table, what a sight. Dave and I are headed to Las Vegas on Dec. 6. Warm weather - yum!

Thanks Roland, I will be cautious! I did the trip once in the snow and it wasn't fun. Have a good one .......... everyone!

Would love to meet for coffee or somthing if you are back on fri. My cell is 770.401.9686 and I'll have it with me. I also travel with the laptop but mom has a new pc too. She lives in Cheshire. My cell has called id so give me a buzz and I'll give you her number or you can give me a number to reach you at. Got to bring a camera if we do so we can post it. Yes, I hear the weather is supposed to be good this time. I usually drive through the Blue Mts and that can get icy or snowy but its beautiful, no tolls, and cruise control crusing usually. Everyone else, please have a great day and be careful,espically you Karen, that can be a LONG trip if it snows.

Have a safe trip all you travelers..................and a Happy Thanksgiving!!

Here in Grand Rapids, MI they are saying measurable snow for Monday. We are leaving on Tu to drive to VT. My two oldest are flying in from college to Bradley on Wed. night. We will all be with my older sister at her vacation home in NH for a big feed on Sat. Then the drive back on Sunday. Lots of driving but worth it for family time. Happy Thanksgiving to all!

No snow here yet, Roland, your Turkey day should be okay. I am going to VT for the day.........am off Friday. How long are you going to be here, mayb we can meet for coffee or something?

Ah, another scotch drinker. My favourite winter libation. I used to drink J&B my parents staple but I have moved up to the Glen, Glenfittish that is. Its smooth and not bitter. Had to go back over to AL this week and the weathers REAL bad. Saw an entire block just disappear in about 10 seconds!!!! Luckily I was up the hill and it didn't touch us but it also blew a few tractors off the freeway and one was a tandem!! Whats worse is that I am fairly blazee about such things as real black clouds and greenish skys..... They say this is going to be a violent November for us. Headed to a warmer place (Destin) tomorrow though. Hope everyone's well and busy getting those turkeys either shot or thawed out for the big day. I hope to be in CT for it with my mom. Easter I'll go visit dad in Prescott Valley. Any snow yet people?

Roland, that sounds fun. If I were going to "retire with a baby grand" it wouldn't be a piano and it wouldn't be lighting up a fat one. Maybe it would be a turkey and the Scotch and a little singing and a nap. I can't believe that T-day is almost here. I guess it's going to be a while till summer comes back. I was just starting to enjoy it. Oh well.

Talahassee tonight folks and its cold here, ugh! But it goes back up tomorrow. Found a great place for steak and retired to the piano (baby grand) after dinner with a few Glenfiddish's. They even got me to sing a few tunes and applauded. It was fun. Haven't done that in years. Home tomorro and then AL next week and hopefully I will be on my way to NewEngland for Turkey the following week.

Some great family chat and insights everyone! I too believe in communication. It is the key to insight. It has taken myself many years to learn that my mom wasnt being a nag, she just truely wants the best and most of all wants me to be happy. As you said Richard, as soon as I understood that I could communicate better and let her realize that I have lead a VERY good life in spite of some downs. I feels quite lucky and am happy and am told that I bring happiness and understanding to others too. That makes me feel good. In Hilton Head tonight. I decided to work part time (with full benies) until my ohter business does well enough to pay the insurances etc. Besides, I like to travel and without management responsibilities its fun to go "visit" clients and see how they are doing. After I was away for about 3 mos its nice to have them receive me with positive manners. So, to you moms, variey to certain individuals is happiness. I found a great card to send to my dad for Vets Day. It thanked him for fighting in WW II to so that I may have the continued freedom that I value so highly. Dads need to be told too, in a different way that we matter.

consultant. Excellant, a new job title. I like the sound of that. You're right Richard. when we get to that point things become much easier.

I like what you wrote, Patti. That's really good advice. And Richard summed it up. I think good communication is really important. I see my kids a lot, even though 2 are out of the house, so I'm pretty involved in the details of their lives. Maybe too involved. I always have to remind myself to step back a little. I guess we're not doing too bad cuz Danit and Rafi, at least, have told us a few times that we've been good parents. Omer's not as verbal, but I hope he agrees. I'm sure they all have criticism too! I'm trying to be a "consultant," as Richard says.

I think your allowed to be a consultant. If you try to be a manager the rubs can be pretty severe.

Happy Veteran's Day everyone. Just in case you want to know: it's 19 degrees here. The beginning of the end.

That must have been a nice time in your relationship Richard. The times when we come to understand each other can be so revealing and can open up communication about so many things. I know the boys think we worry over much and we probably do. But they do know that we're crazy about them and want them to be happy doing whatever they choose with their lives as long as it's not something that will hurt them or some one else.

We don't push them to go back to school but they both know that if they make that choice our help is there as though they went when they graduated high school, like most of their friends. They have good jobs and live resonable lives and though it's not what we figured on it's not for us to decide or make those plans for them. Boy did that take a lot of painful time to figure out.

Growing up in a household where your parents made all the decisions including what your future would be, made for a rude awakening when I tried to raise my own children using my childhood as a guide. I had to learn that it's actually better all around when you let them make their own mistakes and wait to asked for help. Not that I have always done that by any means. I'm still learning but our communication has always been good. I sometimes lean more than I really want to know!

Good idea, Richard! I know Omer hates when I worry about him. It makes him feel like I don't trust him and like he's a little kid. I'm working on it, but it's not easy sometimes.

It took me a long time to realize that my mom was just worried about my happiness. Once I knew this I was able to tell my mom about how happy I was doing whatever and everything went a lot smoother.

Richard I can promise you that your mother is worrying about you. It genetic. We can't help it. It makes up feel needed and keeps the lovely people at Pfizer, Bristol Meyers Squibb, and Merck in business.

All we really want is your happiness. Right Ladies?

I wonder if my mother is worrying about me?